The Power of Pain

Imagine sitting in a room with a Palestinian woman whose brother was killed by heart damage done by an Israeli bullet. Then imagine hearing the story of an Israeli Jew whose 14 year old daughter was killed when a suicide bomber blew himself up in an urban square in Tel-Aviv, killing her and three other children. Imagine them sitting together as friends; knowing each other's families and whose children are friends. That was the experience we had last night, hearing the stories of Aisha, a Palestinian Muslim, and Rami, an Israeli Jew.

Both are members of a group that has, unfortunately grown in number; called Parents Circle and Families Forum which is comprised of women and men who have lost a loved one to this conflict. Both Rami and Aeisha spoke so compellingly about how they were at first, so angry that both had, at first, thought about either suicide or revenge. Neither one believed that she or he would find themselves in a room with "the other" hearing and bearing witness to their pain.

One quote about the power of pain really stood out for me as Rami spoke. He said, "like nuclear energy you can use this enormous power to bring about destruction, or you can use it to bring light and heat, warmth or hope. " Aeisha then jumped in and said: "Ravi's blood is the same color as my blood; his tears are wet like mine; we who have paid the highest price in this war, are willing to continue to work for peace."

In that moment, it was as if the hideous, ugly and menacing wall that we have seen all throughout our travels in the West Bank had crumbled. I thought about how pain can isolate us from one another- separating us into our own private, emotional ghettos; or of how when we share that pain with others, with the intent to heal and not wound, then powerful new possibilities emerge.

This encounter was one that we will remember for the rest of our lives; and will serve as one chink in the wall that we hope one day soon, will be removed, allowing Jews and Palestinians to live in peace. --Kathleen Rolenz

Location:Jerusalem